A Bunch of Stuff...

Around here we have been experiencing some form of flu/cold. It so completely and thoroughly sucks to be sick for this long. I have dubbed it the Green Goo. Take it from me, you don't want it and you don't want to know why I call it that horrible name. It is a tenacious cold/flu strain that appears to never go away. Just when you think you are better, to quote Al Pacino, it "pulls you back in."

We are now entering week two. Tempers are short. People are weepy. Noses are chapped and sore. Kleenex is getting scarce. The wheels have most definitely come off the proverbial bus. Things just don't work well when Mommy is sick.

I have a few random things to share.

1. The measure of maternal devotion is whether or not your child has ever thrown up and or pooped into your hands and how you have reacted. There is a gross out factor to motherhood that no one warns you about. The long and short of it: you will come into contact with more bodily fluids, not your own, than an ER nurse. That is just the truth. Sorry no rainbows and lollipops, here. It ain't pretty, but by the time they actually puke or poo into your hands, you are so numb to it (at least I was) that it barely registers on your radar.

2. On Valentine's Day, Mr. Smith and I went out for a sweetheart breakfast. Unfortunately, the place was mobbed, I was really really hungry and we were seated at a tiny table so close to other diners, I could feel their hot breath and see their pores. The sweetheart breakfast disintegrated into an argument between Mr. Smith and myself that played out via iPhone text messaging so that our insanely close neighbors would not be able to hear our heated discussion about Mr. Smith emphatic insistence that we leave IMMEDIATELY! Everything was fine after we adjourned to a less crowded locale and got a booth for a family of 25. Talk about romance. We know how to capture the spirit of Valentine's Day.

3. I used to date a guy that told me, very seriously, to "stop making fun of me or you are going to give me a complexion." Can you fill in what happened next? He was the same guy that got the terms castration and circumcision mixed up...frequently. He has two sons now. True story.

4. I have never seen Ghostbusters, Jurassic Park, most of the Star Wars saga, or any of the Matrix movies. Sorry big movie studio, big budget folks who make event films. I am just not your girl. Your event movies make me sleepy. Also, this is for you Keanu: do us all a favor and turn in your SAG card. Sorry dude, but seriously, it is awkward and uncomfortable to watch you "act."

5. When you are sick and you are under five, it makes you feel better to play Toy Story and Toy Story 2 on an endless loop for over a week. If you are sick and over five, however, it will make you feel like you are going to fly apart into a million pieces.

6. I have been baking up a yeasty storm over here using this book. It is just lovely to have the aroma of baking bread, that you made with your own hot little hands, wafting through the house. It is simple, elegant, and so tasty. There are dozens of recipes in it, not just for bread, that will strike your fancy. This one is perfect for anyone with a phobia of yeast recipes (Miss Amy, I am looking right at you!).

I mean, seriously people, how gorgeous is this? And this was my first loaf.

and the second loaf.

And here is what the wheat version looks like...

The book was worth every penny. We have had fresh bread each day this week and it is absolute bliss.

Here are some links for recipes I have made in the last few months.


Pioneer Woman's Monkey Bread. This one has no nutritional value whatsoever. I would advise you to make this if and only if you get the Green Goo. Otherwise, you will too be clear-headed to justify eating this one. I am ashamed to confess that I have made this twice. Forgive me.

Murphy's Hot Hamburger. This is not something for the Weight Watcher crowd, but it sure is yummy. I skip making my own fries (since I burnt them beyond all recognition the first time I made this) and use Trader Joe's Potato Wedges. It also makes this recipe so much quicker to whip up and serve.

Zesty Pasta Salad. This one is my last ditch attempt at some kind of redemption. This is actually pretty healthy and REALLY tasty. The perfect side dish for Memorial Day picnics.


Here's hoping none of you get this Green Goo! Have a great weekend!

Giant Spicy Meatballs

I discovered this recipe in Real Simple while I was flying across the country.

I was being sent on a mandatory, no excuses, two week vacation by my boss, Mr. Boss.

I was not planning on coming back.

I wanted to leave the job, the life, the state. I wanted to find some other place, some other way of living, because this one wasn't working for me.

Things at the job were messy to say the very very least.

We could not pay our bills. It was a struggle to make payroll. We had a new client that was a nightmare of neediness that never seemed to end. Mrs. Boss was pregnant and having personality changes that made Sybil seem even-tempered and calm. Due to the wanna be monsoon season we had been experiencing, the office roof had leaked, destroying the lobby rugs, one bathroom and a portion of our training/conference room. The stink of muddy, swamp water in the carpet is unforgettable.

To make matters even worse, I was developing a crush on a new employee. I had a strict rule against ever getting involved with someone at work. I could feel myself wanting to break that rule.

Things were not ideal. I needed to get out of town. I had never taken a two week vacation, especially from this job. Taking a week was usually next to impossible.

My refuge, my place when I am under stress, is the kitchen. Cooking has served me well over the years. It is always a comfort to me. Focusing on the measuring, the ingredients, etc. makes me feel calm.

So, I went to visit my brother, sister-in-law and their children. It was wonderful. It was between Thanksgiving and Christmas, so I got to go with them to get their Christmas tree. I got to make Christmas cookies with my niece and nephew. I got to experience just enough of winter to enjoy it and not feel punished by it.

I was able to read about 10 books. I took naps when I wanted to take naps. My brother and I went back to see our childhood home and neighborhood. And my sister-in-law and I cooked together.

That trip was when I started to hatch my plan for escape. That trip, in my mind, is a dividing line.

When I got back, things had changed.

Mr. and Mrs. Boss were no longer supportive employers. This were taking an ugly turn. They seemed to be setting me up for something. The air felt hostile.

On the other hand, the new employee...ahhh the new employee. Over the next few months, New Guy took up residence in my attention and eventually my heart.

One rainy day, New Guy met me at my car with an umbrella to walk me into the office. He would stay after hours and we would talk, for hours. We would talk on the phone almost constantly. We would email each other throughout the day. Something was definitely going on here, but I could not be sure what it was.

And then, with almost no warning, I smashed my rule. I smashed all of my rules (almost all of my rules), threw them out, obviously, they had not been working anyway, so what good were they?

By April Fool's Day, the New Guy had become Mr. Smith. But that is another story for another day. Or for several days.

Back to the original point of this post, this is a really big recipe (I would recommend cutting it in half unless you want a ton, and I do mean ton, of leftovers. Really really yummy leftovers.). And it makes REALLY BIG meatballs. I have never been a huge fan of meat shaped into other things (balls, loaves, etc.). This one changed my mind. The blend of beef and pork, really makes a huge difference.

Big Spicy Meatballs
2 pounds lean ground beef
2 pounds ground pork
1 medium onion, minced
2 slices soft bread, crusts removed and torn into pieces
5 cloves garlic, minced
2 eggs
½ cup chopped fresh parsley
¼ cup olive oil
1 tablespoon Italian seasoning
1 tablespoon kosher salt

1 ½ cups freshly grated Parmesan
3 teaspoons freshly ground black pepper
1 ½ cups ricotta cheese

Preheat oven to 400°. In a large bowl, combine the first 10 ingredients, 1 cup of Parmesan, and 2 teaspoons of the pepper. Mix just to combine.

Shape the mixture into 16 to 18 large meatballs (each should be about ¾ cup of meat). Place on a baking pan and set aside.

In a medium bowl, combine the ricotta with the remaining pepper; set aside.

Bake the meatballs for 20 minutes in upper third of oven.

Spoon 1 tablespoon of ricotta mixture onto each meatball.

Broil 3 to 5 minutes or until the ricotta just starts to brown.

Serve with jarred marinara sauce or your favorite sauce. Or, if you are feeling sassy, you can leave the meat out of this recipe and serve it with the meatballs.

This recipe is originally from Real Simple, December 2004.

Had anyone heard anything about http://www.condron.us/?

I get a ton of traffic from them, but don't really know what the point is or how they got ahold of my information. Anyone out there know what the deal is with www.condron.us?

Flank-ish Steak

Tonight we had a version of a Steak House Dinner, without having to go to the Steak House. Since I have an aversion to spending that kind of crazy money when I don't have it, this is the perfect deal for me. Plus, I have that thing about not liking to go out. And that thing about not being able to easily leave the stinkin' house because I have these short, needy people that follow me around ALL THE TIME DEMANDING THINGS AND ATTENTION.

But I digress.

Anyway, Pioneer Woman posted this awesome Flank Steak Recipe a while back and I have had it kicking around the kitchen and my brain for a while. We weren't able to locate a Flank Steak at the local grocery, so we went with a London Broil. A little thicker and more difficult to cook adequately for the crowd in this house. Anyway, I decided to make this tonight.

Can I just say...YUM. YUMMY YUMMY YUM YUM!!!

Early in the afternoon I mixed up the marinade, threw it and the meat in a freezer bag, threw that in a 9x13 pan (just in case of a nasty meat leak) and threw that whole mess in the fridge for 3 hours or so.

Cooked it up with some Twice Baked Potatoes and Broccoli Spears (sans hollandaise sauce...drat!) and you got yourself a real Steak House Meal, my friends. Feels decadent, but so isn't.

A word of advice, do the thing with the marinade and make the dipping sauce for the meat. It is AMAZING! Trust me, trust Pioneer Woman...you will be soooooo glad you did.

Philly Cheese Steak Casserole

Last night, despite the balmy temperatures, I fixed this recipe. It was something I dug up on the internet. We are still on our austerity program around here, but splurged on the meat because I am neurotic about fatty meat. It is just this thing I have. So sue me, oh wait, someone is already doing that!

Anyway, I had my misgivings about this one. Not sure about how the meat would be in this concoction. Boy, was I wrong. I whipped this up in the morning and it smelled so good I almost dove in for an early lunch.

Anyway, it survived just fine in the fridge until around 4:30pm, I popped it into the oven for the same amount of time and it came out beautifully. I would imagine you could easily use it with leftover beef, if you have some. It was nice and tender after cooking in the "gravy" and the whole thing was delicious. We had it with steamed green beans.

The recipe was deemed a keeper and so I figured I would share it with you.

Philly Cheese Steak Casserole

6 ozs. wide egg noodles, cooked until almost tender and drained

1 1/2 lbs. beef, boneless sirloin steak, about 3/4-inch thick (I used filet because I am a total freak about fat in meat, but you can use whatever cut you like)

1/4 teaspoon black pepper

1 medium onion, finely chopped

2 garlic cloves, minced

1 green or red pepper, chopped

1 (14 oz.) can fat-free and sodium reduced beef broth

1/4 cup flour

1/2 cup fat-free half-and-half

1 Tablespoon Dijon mustard

1 cup cheddar cheese

Heat oven to 350. Spray 11 x 7 (2 quart) glass baking dish with cooking spray. I used a 9 x 13 pan and it was just fine. Cook and drain noodles as directed on package. Meanwhile, remove fat from beef. Cut beef into 3/4-inch pieces. Heat 12-inch nonstick skillet over medium heat. Cook beef and pepper in skillet 2 to 3 minutes, stirring occasionally, until beef is brown. Stir in onions and bell pepper. Cook 2 minutes, stirring occasionally. Spoon into baking dish. In medium bowl, beat broth and flour with wire wisk until smooth. Add to skillet and heat to boiling. Cook, stirring constantly, until mixture thickens. Remove from heat. Stir in half-and-half and mustard. Spoon over beef mixture. Stir in cooked noodles. Cover and bake for 40 minutes. Sprinkle with cheese. Bake uncovered about 10 minutes longer or until cheese is melted and casserole is bubbly.

Makes 4-6 servings.

Adapted from Betty Crocker, Quick-to-Fix Casseroles